How can a housewife justify multiple affairs?

~Vanguard Nigeria. Sunday, March 5, 2017.

I'VE often wondered what life would be like if it is devoid of the heady sensation of sex? A lot had been said and written on how revered it should be in marriage. Yet, on the other side of the coin, illicit sex is so available you could virtually have it on tap! When you mention kiss and tell, an image of a man pops up. I mean, what married woman in her senses would confess to an affair even with a gun held to her head, let alone brag about the joy of illicit sex? Times are really changing.

The smug smiles a couple of my friends and I wear when we discussed our 'indiscretions' pale into insignificance when compared with what the average adventurous wife gets away with these days. And she's so brazen she often brags about how easy it is to pull the wool over hubby's eyes.

Vivienne, a much younger friend is one of these high-flying professionals with the Midas touch. She currently works with a boss who was recruited from abroad by the firm they both work with. Viv's been bending my ears on how handsome and cosmopolitan Greg, the boss was that on this day I called on her, I automatically switched off when she started singing Greg's praise. I'd reminded her often she'd just been married less than 10 years and affairs should be off her menu. "I love Ebere (the husband) but he could be so predictable at times." She would tell me in her defence. This day in question, she was babbling on about Greg when I took notice of what she had to say. "I often have erotic dreams about him and now we've been teamed to work overtime on our new account, heavens only know what would happen", she said excitedly.

"What do you mean?", I asked in my don't-do-any-thing-foolish voice. "I've been having these erotic dreams about him and now we'll be working together often, anything could happen". I warned her of the consequences of any rash action, then left. But I couldn't get her out of my mind. I was so curious I had to pay her another visit some few months later. "Oh aunty- C, I feel guilty I couldn't give you a call or visit, I've been so busy!' she said. 'I can imagine,' I mumbled under my breath. It is always a delight to visit her anyway as she entertains lavishly whenever I called. With fresh fish stew and boiled potatoes in my belly, being washed down with a very good wine, Viv dropped her bombshell: "I've relived my dream", she declared. I almost choked on the wine as my ears perked up. "Some weeks back, after we'd finished one of our projects, Greg sent for food from the nearest hotel and popped a bottle of champagne he'd put in his fridge. Before the food arrived, we'd almost finished the bottle which explained why I became giggly and hot when Greg started teasing.


I told him about my dreams and he leered. 'Now's the time to find out,' he said as he moved closer – in a few seconds, we were in a clinch, kissing furiously and helping each other out of our clothes. In no time at all, we were on his office couch, making frantic, raunchy love – the thought of my marriage flying out of the window. "I couldn't have stopped him even if I wanted to! When it was over, he looked really proud of his achievement but I didn't mind. It was the best bunk I'd had for months'.


"When I got home, Ebere looked worried, he grumbled I was doing too much for my office. If he only knew! But I felt no guilt. Greg was right. My dream was my subconscious telling me to wake up and realise I needed more than my husband could give me. I love Ebere and would never leave him. Greg, married like me, understood that and whenever we could work late, we make the most of it. And there were some perks to having an affair with the boss. Such as the management course he recommended me for in London. It was for two weeks and I found it a bit dull until, on the second night, I was sitting in the dining area ready to go upstairs to my room when Martin, a course-mate approached.

"We sat talking together and he bought us some drinks. The next day, he took me to another restaurant outside the hotel we were lodged in, and we had so much fun it looked silly not to invite him back to my room. I was obviously attracted to him. The thought of Greg and Ebere flew out the window as Martin helped me, giggling, as I wriggled out of my shoes and jacket. I offered him a drink from the fridge but we were so slushed we couldn't have more.

"I was so desperate to feel him close to me I didn't bother to take all my clothes off. As we made wonderful love on the inviting bed, I wondered: What was happening to me? Had those erotic dreams unlocked another, uninhibited me? Needless to say, the rest of the days flew past and before he left, Martin gave me his mobile number, saying he would like to see me again. So back home, we began meeting regularly whenever we could. So you see, Sis, I'm now a very busy and contented woman!

"As things are now, Ebere, my husband thinks my secret meetings are me 'working hard' in the office. As for Greg, well – it's none of his business, frankly. But I still sleep with him too because I've become greedy. And between the three men in my life, I'm finally satisfied. And my dreams have stopped." To be replaced by a nightmare where she would be caught? She shrugged. "I know I'm having my cake and eating it," she said. "And I could choke. But I love my secret life, my three men – in spite of the possibility that one day soon, I could be found out!"