One night stands are seldom planned - you find yourself in the company of the opposite sex, the chemistry is so charged that nothing matters but that electrifying moment - not your reputation and certainly not common-sense.A few months back, Afusat found herself in a very lavish bachelor's eve party. "The couple were in their mid-thirties", explains Afusat, "and most of the guests were successful corporate players who came to the party to unwind.
I was 32, engaged to be married soon and laughed indulgently at some of my friends who were out on manhunt. As I made my way to the bar to get a refill for my gin and tonic, a deep voice boomed behind me, What a party!
Are you a friend of the groom-to-be? Turning round, I saw a real hunk, with a clean shaven head and mischievous look. Falteringly, I told him I was the bride's good friend.
"Then we were chatting and laughing. How had he managed to escape the clutches of my man-hungry friends? I don't know how long we chatted for, but my head started swimming mischievously at this deliciously dangerous stranger. When he latched on to my hand, I didn't pull out. He told me he came for the bachelor eve's do from out of town and had a room in the hotel where the eve was being held. "I'm only here for the night', he whispered into my ear. `Why don't we go upstairs for a proper drink?"
"He put his arm around me and stirred me towards the exit. I stumbled along and didn't resist. I was very tipsy. I tripped as we c limbed the stairs and he helped me into his very impressive hotel room. As soon as the door slid shut, his lips found mine.
I snogged him back, feeling drunk, lustful and gorgeous. We made mad passionate love and I must have blacked out. The next thing I realised was waking up the next morning, surveying my surrounds. For a while, I couldn't work out where I was. Then I noticed a scribbled note on the table. `You were sleeping so peacefully I didn't want to wake you up, it said, `You need to check out by noon...
"I felt so ashamed as everything started coming back. I shuddered at what I'd done - sleeping with a total stranger! My head was in my palms when my mobile shrilled. `Afusat', Rolly, my best friend shrieked down the phone.
What happened to you? One of the bouncers at the party said he saw you staggering about before you disappeared. I'd been ringing your land line all night ...' I told her I would soon be over to her place. In the few minutes it took me to get to her flat by taxi, I'd already a perfect answer. So, arriving at the flat, I collapsed into my friend's arms.
`My drink must have been spiked', I blurted. The tears were real as I told her how I'd been dancing at the party when I'd suddenly felt everything turning woozy. I lied that I went outside to get some air and that was the last thing I remembered until I woke up in my sitting room.
My friend was really shocked. She said I should thank my lucky stars that I was not attacked, raped or even kidnapped by ritualists. She believed I'd been left traumatized when the truth was I couldn't trust myself when lust stared me in the face.
"Weeks later, I'd put the experience behind me when out of the blues, my mystery man rang my mobile! I must have given him my number in my drunken stupor and hearing his seductive voice brought memories of that lust-filled night flooding back. He was in town on business and wanted us to meet up. All of a sudden, the thought of my safe boring fiance deserted me as lust for this new man came rushing in. So, I went to meet him, this time, very sober and the experience was even more mind-boggling than the first time!"
Tonia's case best friend, Dave, was a hot item with another friend of hers when Dave phoned her in a very happy mood to inform Tonia that Laide, her girlfriend was pregnant and they were both thinking of getting married. Naturally, she was both their choice of a chief bride's maid.
Tonia told me: "Without informing me, they'd already made all the necessary arrangements, their wedding was just ten weeks away! They naturally assumed that, as a good friend, I would be happy for them and fall in line with their plans.
"At that moment, I really hated Tonia. I'd fancied Dave for years but he sees me only as a good friend. Over the next few weeks, I had to hear all about Tonia's scan, her plans for the wedding and the bachelor's eve do.
On the day of the party, Dave stayed with me pending the time he would show up at the party to be doused in booze. He was so happy that he kept knocking back the booze before he sprawled on my sofa, his legs spread wide. To this day, I don't know why I started kissing him wildly. His eyes flew open. Looking fleetingly surprised, he suddenly reached out for my boobs, his kiss as urgent as mine.
Wrestling with each other's clothes, we tumbled to the floor and made wide passionate love - the harsh carpet grinding into my back, notwithstanding. After making love, he fell back to sleep right there on the floor and I slept next to him, foolishly thinking he would be regretting the wedding now that he'd realised it was me he loved.
But when I woke up the next morning, he was nowhere to be seen. He rang later and apologised for taking advantage of our friendship and hoping I would forgive him. He then said he would see me later at the registry.
It was as if I'd been slapped in the face. Yet, the show must go on. With a fake smile on my face, my humiliation was complete as I watched how happy my two friends were together. All I had going through my mind during the ceremony was my humiliation and the fool I'd made of myself …"
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